being divorced against your will.. not easy... knew that before...
having been on my own for 3 years I have gotten used to it and adjusted well I think..
have come to appreciate certain elements of being single, still some I do not like..
know that God alone will be the One to orchestrate a match... ( it is far too complicated to figure this out by oneself )
still thought that I could / should "orchestrate" the "meeting"... as if, as my great friend today said to me "God didn't know my address or something???? " hilarious...
trusting Him to know who I am, because He made me, and how that "match" would look... how come I can't trust Him for the where and when and how .. and IF.... this will happen..
another step to take on my journey. trusting Him more.. like another friend of mine told me she is praying for me: "that I would no longer seek.."
so, to be a witness for how great my God is, and that I so desire to please Him and love Him and serve Him, I will, by His strength, try to stay away from any "means" to seek for a potential mate...
He does indeed know my address and I think He can easily bring this man, if there is one, into my path in some way..
like my pastor ( shepherd :) just told me recently... Jesus, who is my husband, and the lover of my soul, jealously guards my heart and it has to be He who gives it away to the right one...
okay.. now I said it..
it's all good.. because God is good.. He has given me 3 daughters, wonderful friends, a great church and a calling on top of it.. blessings galore... I am thankful and I will try to rest in this..... :)
I know it's hard sweetie...I consciously decided to stop distracting my mind from 'looking' over a year ago. So much more at peace in that regard now.
ReplyDelete