time to move on: "Turmoil" officially OVER!!!!!

lying in bed feeling sorry for myself.. sore teeth, gum, jaw and head.. thinking of all the things I have to do, arrange and pay for as soon as I get better, my car, one tire is losing air and it is DIRTY, inside and out, my "garden", front and backyard is a wasteland.. clients texting me, their lives so much harder than mine.. anyways, as I was feeling sorry for myself and then bad about myself for feeling sorry for myself, I realized that 3 years ago, I became aware that the end of my marriage was looming as a horrendous threat over me...
3 years ago...
wow, it is crazy how time flies ...
truth is, my life is very different now, many worries and issues have been added, others have been taken away.. and even though, when I feel sorry for myself it often has to do with some of those changes, I still think that the time of "turmoil" caused by the break up of my marriage is pretty much over..
hence.. I thought it was time to put "Beauty in the Turmoil" to rest...
my life is more about the daily struggle of living a godly life in a very evil world... fighting against my own habits and issues, trying to be obedient and struggling with disobedience, trying to trust God for everything, when some of it scares me, still... struggling to be patient and kind and loving when it seems there is not much left to draw from.. struggling to be disciplined, in all areas of my life when I'd rather be taking it easy, as in lazy, as in unhealthy ...
regular daily struggles of regular people...
so what I only have 60 % of the teeth everyone else seems to have and my mouth is bruised, sore and tender... so what, my father is selfish and cruel and has never loved anyone in his life,
so what I am alone with all the duties of keeping a house going, dealing with kids that have been left as I have been... so what my parents are ageing and unforgiveness has made them bitter, negative and hard to be around..... so what they are dealing with sickness that seems to be pretty scary..
most people have at least that much to deal with, if not more..
so, I am officially declaring the time of turmoil is over and I am just a regular single mother who tries to live to please God ..
it's a no brainer for me: He loved me first, I love Him, I do not want to disappoint Him... I do, He forgives me, I try again.. that's it!