.. more "juicy" tidbits of information :) ...

over the last few years so many of my friends have been commenting about how open and vulnerable I am when writing here..
truth is, I am trying to please God, not man, He loves me for who I am, He knows all that is going on in my heart and so why would I feel the need to hide anything from "whoever" ?
if it helps others to read about someone struggling with real life issues, and if it encourages or turns someone to Jesus by reading how when I fix my eyes on Him " all things on earth will grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace"... then Hallelujah.. it is a good thing!!!!


so there is another tidbit of "juicy" information about me:
for the last 4 years I have been on an anti depressant... low dosage, not supposed to be addicting.. was supposed to get off it again after a year, but, lo and behold, right at that time my husband had just betrayed and abandoned me and both my Physician and me decided that maybe this was not such a good time to stop taking it..

the only real benefit I have ever noticed has been that I can fall asleep easier.. it seems I am more relaxed...

also, I am not quite as teary when watching shows or movies than I would usually be..
so I had come to the conclusion that maybe it was kind of balancing out my feelings.. well, I still cried a lot when going through the valley of separation and divorce.. since I have come out of it though I thankfully haven't had that much reason to cry.. usually...

just lately big changes in the make-up of my family have had me in tears and I have to admit, I was kind of surprised it is affecting me the way it does..
I really shouldn't be, surprised that is,  having had to grieve the loss of my marriage and all this meant, I am well acquainted with pain caused by losing someone you love.

once again my only comfort is found in the fact that God is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow and He is trustworthy, He loves everyone involved and His plans are to prosper and not to harm.. to give a hope and a future..

I thank Him for the blessing of relationships and love and bonds being formed.. I thank Him for blessing me with 3 wonderful daughters, whose lives are a precious gift from Him and which will forever enrich my life.. I am thankful to God for caring as deeply as He does for all of us..
my tears are shed because hearts are breaking right now and that never is a nice thing... again I wish I could make it all better but I know that only One can.. praying that everyone will turn their eyes upon Jesus, look full in His wonderful face... and I know, that then the things on earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace...
Praise the Lord!!!