..He makes all things beautiful in HIS time... ( not mine )

up late.
tough day ahead.
trusting God for all it will bring.

just read an old blogpost I called: " Wait my child"

it's from August 22, 2010

just a little over 8 months after my marriage had come to an end.
shattered into many pieces,
gathering them up and bringing them to my Lord
waiting was a huge struggle

patience, there is a reason it is part of the fruit of the Spirit
because we don't have any
or not much anyways.

waiting
trusting
surrendering
accepting

I didn't know how to wait
I wanted things to change
I wanted to know

I wanted to be done
with the pain
the loneliness
the difficulties

I wanted to fast forward
I wanted to be fixed

but that's just not how this works

there were many things He wanted to teach me still
before He would bring me to this new place
where restoration and redemption would happen

He never left my side through all of this
He worked with me,
gently
tenderly
and bound up my broken heart.

He taught me about Himself
I saw Him clearer
I learned to trust Him more

He taught me to take my eyes of myself
and fix them on Him
He called me to serve Him
He healed my innermost being
as I offered His comfort to those He sent me

I have learned to wait a little bit better
I am a little more patient

and
now
I am rejoicing and just drinking it all in

to be loved like this.
such extravagant love poured out on me
by Him,
the Creator of the Universe
the Lord of lords and the King of kings

how can I not serve Him
praise and worship Him
give Him all the glory

it's not about me
it never has been
it's all about Him
He alone is worthy to be praised

Abba Father
Lover of my soul
I can't resist the tenderness in You.