... happiness and losses..... bittersweet reality...

“I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten"

“Forget the former things;

    do not dwell on the past.

 See, I am doing a new thing!

    Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?

I am making a way in the wilderness

    and streams in the wasteland.

it's an amazing thing...
He restores the years the locusts have eaten.. He really does.
He is doing a new thing.
in it I can see more clearly who He is.
He is able. more than able. ( and by that I mean POWERFUL. UNSTOPPABLE )
He is in control. sovereign. in charge.
He cares. He really does.
He is merciful. and kind. and detail oriented too.
He loves me. wow

I am so very blessed.
I love Him more.
I am more thankful.

I am also realizing something else.
as elated, ecstatic and happy as I am,
as thankful as I am,
as blessed beyond belief as I am.
it is bittersweet.

you know,
I came to Canada, from Germany, 23 year ago.
my first 4 years or so were extremely lonely.
never thought I could ever really connect with the people here in Canada.
I didn't think I could express who I was well enough in this foreign language.
never thought anyone would really get who I am,
our backgrounds so very different.
then. I became, by God's grace, a born again follower of Jesus Christ.
all of a sudden the people I met became more than friends very quickly.
we shared what was and is most important in our lives..
our love for Jesus.
we shared a purpose.
bringing glory to Him.
and.. I was no longer lonely.

through the years some of those friendships, ( and they are eternal ones.. how cool is that )
have become so deep, so very precious, that... even though I am so very happy and blessed by all that's happening in my life's "love department" ..
I am sad.
very sad.

change.
in some areas we so long for it.
in other areas. the good ones..
we really don't want it.
there are many I will miss.
there are some that thinking about leaving I am in tears on a regular basis already.
it seems
even in the good times
loss is a reality.

so,
as I am remembering a loss that occurred exactly 3 months ago
I am sad.
about losing my cutest little puppy
my Minnie
and, about all the many losses that will be happening
in a few months time

now, trying to be positive
I can come back and visit
and I will regularly 
my beloved daughters live here 
and I do have sisters here.
given to me by my Lord.
He knows how much I love them.
5 hours one way.
no big deal.
not for a German / Canadian girl that likes driving.

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.