.. the world grows strangely dim.. Auf Wiedersehen Facebook... :)

 I am about to take a little break from the social networking scene.. I have loved being on Facebook since I joined in 2008.. it's been a great place of connecting with my family and friends... a great place to connect with people I met somewhere for a little while, and those I never met.. I have been encouraged and inspired, I have felt loved and appreciated, I have tried to build up and support, have laughed and cried with my friends on there.. I have been part of their lives and they have been part of mine.. so really, as I am taking a break, I am not doing this because anything bad has ever transpired for me there...

and yet, over the last few months, more and more I have felt that I needed to step out of the limelight... felt that I needed to focus on where God has me, making the circle a bit smaller..

as my kids are growing up and the connecting is more short intervals of quality time, I have learned to be more intentional about it , more focused...

as the needs in my extended family have been changing, as parents are aging and God has been showing me that I need to embrace my role more intentionally there also... I want to be obedient and do that, as well as I can..

over the last 5 years, while walking through difficulty and turmoil God has used my wider circle of Facebook friends to uphold me..  He has always provided "Christ beside me"..

He has blessed me with a church family, deep connections with Jesus as our foundation.. sisters and brothers in Christ, "getting" me like no one else..

BUT... most of all... He really has shown me that it really, totally is ABOUT HIM...

so, on this journey over the last 4 months, when my nicely constructed house of cards just fell apart one day... I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I needed to look to Him, not even to my fellow believers that much.. as He gave me peace I have learned that I don't need to be out there telling everyone...  (and again, I don't think there is anything wrong with that... )
I have become a little protective of my closeness with the lover of my soul.. as I have been turning my eyes upon Jesus, the world has grown strangely dim...

I don't think I am able to put into words what I really feel... I am just so very, very blessed... so thankful, so full of love for Him, who indeed is ALL we need..
He has put me and uses me in a place where I can find purpose and bring glory to His name.. He has given me a ministry and such over abundant love for the people I get to minister to..
He has proven Himself faithful to me over and over and over again..

just last night and today He "single-handedly" removed the black clouds out of my life.. provided and took care of me like no one ever could...  and so, I am stepping away from the distraction for a while, because I want to give Him all He deserves.. all the Praise and Glory due His Name..

He is marvellous, He is majestic and mighty..
He is all powerful and He is mine..

and I am His...

it doesn't get much better than this..

I am in awe of His love for me
His mercy
His grace..

I love all the people He has put in my life and I will never run out of love for all of them..

because He fills my cup to overflowing each and every day...


It is, and has always been and will always be all about Him and Him Alone..
#SoliDeoGloria

LOVE is ... to know and to be known....

so amazed at our Father in Heaven and the fact that He indeed wants a close personal relationship with me..

when I first found out about that a little over 20 years ago it blew me away... since then it continues to boggle my mind and fill my heart with love..

no matter how long I live I know I will not be able to fully discover what this love He has for me all contains..

He has been my refuge in times of trouble..
He has been my encourager and cheerleader when I think I can't do it anymore..
He has been my provider, my Healer... and most of all He IS the Lover of my soul...

50 years old now I have come to the conclusion that love is to know and to be known by the "partner" in the relationship.. for someone to never tire of hearing from you and willingly sharing what he/she is all about..

I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that He always wants to hear from me.. this is what His Word tells me about this:

This is what the Lord, the God of your father David, says: I have heard your prayer and seen your tears; I will heal you. ( 2 Kings 20:5)

The Lord has heard my cry for mercy; the Lord accepts my prayer.( Psalm 6:9 )

 God has surely listened and has heard my prayer. Praise be to God, who has not rejected my prayer
 or withheld his love from me! ( Psalm 66: 19-20)

The Lord is far from the wicked, but he hears the prayer of the righteous. ( Proverbs 15:29)

But the angel said to him: “Do not be afraid, Zechariah; your prayer has been heard. Your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son, and you are to call him John. ( Luke 1:13 )

and He has given me this book... He is the author and all I need to know is contained in it's pages.. He has revealed Himself and by His Spirit, that dwells within me I can know Him.. intimately..

as I spent more and more time with Him my love for Him is just going to grow and grow as I am understanding more and more how much He loves me... it's all quite amazing actually :)

so even on days like today.. when some clouds on the horizon seem black somehow.. when this weary feeling wants to take over.. when I find myself getting unsettled and sighing more than usually.. I can be sure of that.. He loves me with an everlasting love.. He will never leave me or forsake me and He is indeed all that I will ever need!

SO grateful for that!!!!

... "Fly Baby Bird Fly"... He's got it under CONTROL....

so she has left the nest.. my little baby bird.. the little one, the last one... the spoiled, over protected, unique, precious youngest daughter of mine..

excited for what these next few months will teach her.. she is growing up, and I like what I am seeing.. strong inside and passionate.. she has been making good choices navigating through this rather confusing, at times overwhelming world..

she has been texting, calling and emailing and I have seen a few pictures too... I am happy to see her smile.. praying for exactly that.. just looking at the last picture I got a little sad though...

I think that is one part of what this is.. for the longest time, actually for the her entire life.. I was pretty much around.. well, obviously not all the time, she was always a little busy social butterfly.. but still... not to be around at all is going to be strange.. it's okay.. and, she in her very wonderful letter to say Good bye to me she even said it.. this is a time for me.. not to have to take care of her anymore.. how cute.. and how weird... :)

I know that our God has it all laid out perfectly... the growing up is part of His perfect plan.. for each one of us.. just learned some more of how beautifully, creatively and amazingly He has EVERYTHING planned out..

always liked the story of Naomi and Ruth, her daughter in law.. and Boaz, the Kinsman Redeemer, who, man of integrity that he was, came in and solved all the problems they had... Naomi, wife of Elimelech.. whose faith in His God was not strong enough to keep him in his native land during a famine , fleeing to Moab, a hostile country.. both sons getting married to Moabite women, ( sinning again... ) lost her husband and both her sons in this foreign land and ended up returning to Bethlehem, returning home,  hiding under the protection of the God of her people... bitter and without hope..

but there He had put all those plans and provision  in place for her.. laws about gleaning, ( grains purposefully left behind by those harvesting for the poor, the orphans and widows ) and ultimately the Kinsman Redeemer... redeeming the land that was Naomi's but that she was not able to work, and marrying Ruth ... so the two women were taken care of....

and then.. He, Our Good and Merciful God, who loves us so... He goes even further.. He, who is able to do all things, He "gives conception" to the formerly barren Ruth.. and the family lineage can go on.. "funny" how this son, Obed, ends up to be the father of Jesse, who was the father of David...

what started out as disobedience and rebellion led to a homecoming, back under the authority and protection of Him, who is wise beyond what we could ever even comprehend.. who is forgiving, and infinitely loving.. and He.. He had it all planned out long before.. bringing good from the bad for those that love Him, trust Him and obey Him..

so for all of us letting go of our children.. we can be assured that He has it all planned out down to the most intricate detail... His love for them far outweighs ours ( as much as I cannot get my head around that one ) ... so... "empty nest" mothers and fathers... trust Him and wait expectantly on Him .. He is going to do great things in the lives of our baby birds :)

.. I am really really NOT afraid, because He really really loves me :)

I realized something over the last week... I am NOT afraid... how cool is that???

over the last few months life has been rather scary..
for someone like me that seems to have been born with a knot in her stomach.. a fearful little girl.. treated badly and scared ... so many fears..

then He came into my life 20 years ago..  so much scared me.. roller coasters, the horses I had to ride, because my father wanted me to, so afraid of so many things.. couldn't sleep when my husband wasn't home.. was scared of flying.. never could relax for a second of it..  had gastritis and all kinds of anxiety most of my life...

He has healed me of most of those fears.. and then the unthinkable happened over 3 months ago and fear entered back in.. not in my mind, I knew I could trust the Lord, but in my body... that knot was there again.. it disappeared but then things didn't go as hoped, as prayed and asked God for...

read something posted on Facebook by a friend today... "how do I deserve that.." strange... I don't look at it that way.. so much always seems to go the worst possible way for me.. and I am convinced He allows it because He loves me... He is not overlooking anything... He, in His purposeful Goodness is at work in my life.. nothing happens outside His will..

and now, as I got really bad news, am facing the worst possible scenario and it is hanging over me ... I am NOT afraid.. that is so COOL!!!!!!!!!!!

learned about trusting and knew I wanted to do it.. without this little exercise over the last 3 months.. having to run to Him with no other way out.. there was and is just absolutely nothing I or anyone for that matter can do... and tada.... I am trusting Him... and I have peace.. I am not afraid... surrendered to His will , convinced it is the best for me.. like never before..

so I am only thankful...so very very ETERNALLY thankful.. all He says is TRUE.. and HE is all I need... I know that too now.. just so cool... go to Him and check it out.. it works...... He is who He says He is..  He ROCKS!!!!

.. You are my witness, and my servant, I have chosen you...

there are 66 books in the Bible.. and 1189 chapters...
in my search for what the Bible says about God and the glory, His glory, and us living for His glory I was led to that one chapter out of the 1189...  for the last few days I have been amazed by how much is in that one chapter..

He never ceases to amaze me...

His promise to be with us in the water and the river,  to keep us safe and not let the waters sweep over us..
His promise to be with us in the fire, to make sure that we won't get burned..

I have been thinking about this since "Worst case scenario" came to be..
walking through the river.. the waters, the flood, the storm, it's not pleasant... there will be a strong current that will try to pull us under.. yet, He will not let us drown..

walking through the fire.. we will not be alone or even get burned and killed, but, you can be sure about that, it will be HOT....

clearly Isaiah is referring to leading the people of Israel to safety by parting the Red Sea and the story about the furnace...

I think that Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego were uncomfortable, I am sure they didn't enjoy being thrown in the furnace and I am sure it didn't feel so well... they came out alive and in there, the had the Lord with them, and even in that heat, they must have had a most amazing experience, despite the fact they were in a blazing hot furnace...

as I am facing all the "Worst Case Scenario" will mean to me in the next few months, I am aware and weary, I have to admit, for all that will mean.. for what it will cost me and how hard it will be..yet, even yesterday, when trying to focus on Him to make it through the day.. there was a moment when He overwhelmed me with His love and care and provision...  it blows my mind..

reading on in Isaiah 43 it says this:

“You are my witnesses,” declares the Lord,

    “and my servant whom I have chosen,

so that you may know and believe me

    and understand that I am he.

Before me no god was formed,

    nor will there be one after me.

I am His witness, I am His servant and He chose me.. ha... how can I be a witness to how He saves us and walks with us and never leaves us, even in the fire... without walking through the fire.. how can I know that this is true without experiencing it? How can I believe and understand and know Him more and love Him more, and witness about Him more and serve Him more... without Him walking with me through deep waters and making sure I am not drowning...  I know how it feels to be in a blazing hot furnace, I know how scary it can be and how unbearable.. but, I also know my God to be there with me.. I know Him, how much He cares and what He is all about.. I know His blessing and love in a way I would never know it had all always been nice and dandy and easy...

so... I believe without a shadow of a doubt that indeed He is doing a new thing... the old is done and over with... my past, as much as He allowed it, does not define me, this is not my legacy... this does not have to go on... His blessing is on me, because He loved me first I LOVE Him with all my heart and soul and mind, and I believe that He is making a way in the wilderness..  and streams in the wasteland.. the river of His Spirit is flowing and it is refreshing me.... as I am walking through the fire... 

....peace when the THREAT LEVEL is upgraded to RED.. All Glory be to HIM...

received an email last night, finally, after a frustrating almost 3 months of waiting, and as much as it is so much better to at least have an idea what to expect, the news itself was not good..

over the last little while I have been trying to hide in my Father in Heaven's embrace.. trusting Him and not being afraid of what might be coming my way...

and now it is here... worst case scenario..

sharing the news with some friends asking them to pray, in an eerie way the peace never quite left me.. that peace that surpasses all understanding has been mine throughout all of this... trusting and not being afraid as I drifted of to sleep and throughout the night the only prayer I had was that He would be glorified through all of this..

thanks to technology I was able to do a little search of the Bible for the word "glory" this morning.. these are a few of the scriptures I found..

Sing to the Lord, all the earth;

    proclaim his salvation day after day.

 Declare his glory among the nations,

    his marvelous deeds among all peoples.

1 Chronicles 16:23-24

 I will extol the Lord at all times;

    his praise will always be on my lips.

 I will glory in the Lord;

    let the afflicted hear and rejoice.

 Glorify the Lord with me;

    let us exalt his name together.

Psalm 34:1-3

All your works praise you, Lord;

    your faithful people extol you.

 They tell of the glory of your kingdom

    and speak of your might,

 so that all people may know of your mighty acts

    and the glorious splendor of your kingdom.

Psalm 145:10-12

there are many of those and they just confirmed what my heart was telling me.. rejoicing in Him, praising Him and giving Him the glory is what it is all about, no matter how harsh the circumstances..

I kept on scrolling through the scriptures and " Oh, the depth of the riches of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable his judgments, and his paths beyond tracing out!".... He had so much more for me..

Isaiah 43 has been a place where even throughout these last 3 months I have found some real encouragement and peace... there is verses 1-3.. the walking through the river and fire part.. love that one.. then there was the one I really have been clinging to.. verses 18-19:

“Forget the former things;

    do not dwell on the past.

 See, I am doing a new thing!

    Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?

I am making a way in the wilderness

    and streams in the wasteland.

the verses that were listed for "glory" where verses 4-7.. following right after the promise that He would walk with us through the fires.. and the raging storms..

here it is:

Since you are precious and honored in my sight,

    and because I love you,

I will give people in exchange for you,

    nations in exchange for your life.

 Do not be afraid, for I am with you;

    I will bring your children from the east

    and gather you from the west.

 I will say to the north, ‘Give them up!’

    and to the south, ‘Do not hold them back.’

Bring my sons from afar

    and my daughters from the ends of the earth—

 everyone who is called by my name,

    whom I created for my glory,

    whom I formed and made.”

I marvel at my God, the Mighty One, I marvel at His Word, I marvel at His love and provision, for this is what He said to me...

I created you for my glory... I love you and you are precious in my sight.. I will walk with you through the difficult things that you now know are coming your way.. you don't have to be afraid.. in my mighty power I will make all things work out.. because I created you for my glory, I made you and formed you... and... just to give you a light at the end of this very dark and scary tunnel.... I am about to do a new thing... forget the old and bad stuff that is causing all this for you.. there will be streams in the wilderness and I will give you rest in the presence of your enemies.. I will do new things that you cannot even imagine, because ...you are mine, you are precious and honoured in my sight... 

my heart is once again overflowing with His grace and love...  because He is faithful and when we seek Him with all our heart He is found.. I asked that His glory would be seen through all this ... and wow, did He ever meet me..

In the morning, Lord, you hear my voice;

    in the morning I lay my requests before you

    and wait expectantly.

...CHANGES.. good and bad... but HE never changes :)

 just saw this picture on Facebook.. I follow all these amazing photographers that take pictures of lighthouses around the Great Lakes..
I have been to this lighthouse, it is on Lake Superior.. I fell in love with it right away.. chances are I will never go there again, so looking at this picture makes me think of good things coming to an end, how everything changes and how sometimes we do not like that...



 then there was this picture a few days ago.. this is a lighthouse on Lake Michigan and, God willing I will be there in less than two weeks.. I am planning to take many amazing pictures of all the lighthouses around that area when I go on my first ever "all by myself road trip"....

I am apprehensive about going all by myself, preparing myself to spend a week without anyone to share it with..  this is just one way a change that happened  a few years ago continues to work itself out in my life...

I am excited and I am scared..   but the good thing with road trips is one can turn around anytime one feels like it ;)

then there is this picture... I think it was about 16 years ago... a change happened about 3 months later.. our little puppy, only 10 months at the time, was run over by a car and died..  I remember grieving her loss and thinking I would never ever want a dog again...

the little girl in the picture was especially cute back then.. she was so tiny and so excited about everything she saw... she loved the puppy.. the three of us had an amazing summer that year...






 and there she is now.. finished school and ready to do some more growing up.. she is ready, I am not sure how ready I am...  changes..  they are part of life.. things never quite stay the way they are.. often that is a good thing... other times we have a little bit of a harder time with it..

made me think of the One that never changes... there is no need for Him to change, because He already is perfect.. He is holy.. and just, and merciful and caring. He is all knowing and all powerful.. but most of all He is faithful and keeps His promises.. He never lies.. He can't.. He is truth and He is all we need...

facing changes can be quite difficult.. thankfully the One that never changes  always stays with us... He will never leave, neither for a sad or a good reason, He just won't.. He is more committed to us, than we can ever be to Him... He knows us and loves us and I am sure He is pleased to see us change into His likeness more and more....

I am thankful that I am aware that nothing ever stays the same  (other than Him ), it gives me hope in some situations.. (the bad ones), and it makes me more intentional about engaging lovingly in the other ones.. like letting my baby fly the nest...

all in all... it is all good, because that never changing One, He will use everything in our lives for the good for those, that love Him, that have been called according to His purpose...

All my changes come from Him,

He who never changes..

I am held firm in the grasp

of the Rock of all the Ages!

thankful for that... ETERNALLY...