over the last few months life has been rather scary..
for someone like me that seems to have been born with a knot in her stomach.. a fearful little girl.. treated badly and scared ... so many fears..
then He came into my life 20 years ago.. so much scared me.. roller coasters, the horses I had to ride, because my father wanted me to, so afraid of so many things.. couldn't sleep when my husband wasn't home.. was scared of flying.. never could relax for a second of it.. had gastritis and all kinds of anxiety most of my life...
He has healed me of most of those fears.. and then the unthinkable happened over 3 months ago and fear entered back in.. not in my mind, I knew I could trust the Lord, but in my body... that knot was there again.. it disappeared but then things didn't go as hoped, as prayed and asked God for...
read something posted on Facebook by a friend today... "how do I deserve that.." strange... I don't look at it that way.. so much always seems to go the worst possible way for me.. and I am convinced He allows it because He loves me... He is not overlooking anything... He, in His purposeful Goodness is at work in my life.. nothing happens outside His will..
and now, as I got really bad news, am facing the worst possible scenario and it is hanging over me ... I am NOT afraid.. that is so COOL!!!!!!!!!!!
learned about trusting and knew I wanted to do it.. without this little exercise over the last 3 months.. having to run to Him with no other way out.. there was and is just absolutely nothing I or anyone for that matter can do... and tada.... I am trusting Him... and I have peace.. I am not afraid... surrendered to His will , convinced it is the best for me.. like never before..
so I am only thankful...so very very ETERNALLY thankful.. all He says is TRUE.. and HE is all I need... I know that too now.. just so cool... go to Him and check it out.. it works...... He is who He says He is.. He ROCKS!!!!
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