...quietly submit to the trials and tribulations.. :O

Remember He is the artist and you are only the picture. You can't see it. So quietly submit to be painted. 

C.S. Lewis

another Sunday, another opportunity to worship with the family God has placed us in .. another sermon about suffering, I think this was the last one in the series "Why me?" 

timely to hear about what we need to focus on if we want to be able to see God in our trials..

as Christians, children of God I heard a wise man say one day that we are either in, have just come out, or will enter into a time of trial and suffering.. it's because He, our Father in Heaven is committed to making us holy, more like Him, and He will not stop until He takes us home one day..

this man, James McDonald, went on to say that if you were not experiencing any trial for a long time you might want to test yourself and see if you are really one of His children..

so, sermons about suffering are always timely.. learning to not try to run from it but embrace it, knowing that He who allowed it has only our best interest in mind, will never hurt us or harm us, learning to look to Him, not become angry, bitter, full of doubt, turn away or try to control the situation.. that's always a very good thing..  God the Father always is all about accomplishing His purposes for us, He wants to teach us to trust Him, let us receive His comfort so we can comfort others, take our eyes of ourselves and minister to others instead, He sometimes just plain will use our suffering to show His power and glory.. not fighting this but accepting and surrendering is what we need to do..

last sermon of the series focused on how we can make sure we are able to see God in our suffering ...

there were steps like confessing sin immediately,  surrendering completely ( wow, being content in our suffering and accepting it fully) loved the next one: thinking biblically.. filtering our thoughts through the verse in Philippians 4.. whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.... standing firm on what we know is true.. no matter how things around us look or feel, endure patiently and, last but not least: struggle corporately...

ha...

having had the immense privilege of being a part of a place where this was happening at all times, I guess I had not realized how hard life would be if this part was not working...

if there was no one near to come walk alongside you, to encourage and uphold you through prayer, through pointing to scriptures and just to love and to care ..

I was aware that this is what has carried me through all the many years of being a follower of Christ and His refining work in my life.. have enjoyed the privilege of walking alongside other believers, sister and brothers in Christ and those the Lord has allowed me to share my faith with through the Pregnancy Center..

so today, as I wrote down the last point, I thanked Him, that this indeed has been my experience for so long , also realizing that having kind of lost this family and not quite connected in this way with the new one has had me in this rather difficult stage over the last little while..

so thankful that today I got to talk to a few more people at the church and new things will start up soon.. 

knowing and believing firmly that God is in TOTAL control of ALL my circumstances at ALL times, I know He wanted this like this.. I can see why as well, or at least a little bit anyways..

growing together as husband and wife without this kind of network of caring brothers and sisters had us look to each other only in those times of need ..  and so we failed, we succeeded, we cried and we met each other on levels far deeper than ever before.. what a blessing.. hard at times but oh so good.. the Lord turning the difficult into something very good for both of us, because we love Him, because we have been called according to His amazing purpose..

is it going to be a struggle to always be patient, surrendered and focusing on Him and being content in all the ongoing struggles and future trials? oh for sure... but.. I know that He, the Daddy in Heaven has our backs and His plans are perfect.

I know His intentions and I am thankful that He will not give up making us more holy each day..

But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do;  for it is written: “Be holy, because I am holy.

1 Peter 1: 15-16

.. called to more than that..... in His time....

“Love each other with the same love you have for your family. In fact, you should love each other with the same love that is shared between two brothers. The value you place on each other should be so high that it makes you desire to see those you love excel and achieve much in life, even if it means that they excel and achieve more than you do.”

Romans 12:10 

( Rick Renner: Sparkling Gems of the Greek)

reading this right now explains a little why if there was a litmus test for what level of grief and sadness you were going through I think I would be scoring on the higher end...

having been blessed by the Lord to be part of a "church family" where this kind of brotherly, (and sisterly ) respectful love was flowing freely for almost all of my Christian life, it makes sense that there is a profound sense of loss..  makes sense that walking in and out of a church without so much as talking to someone for a moment let alone connect meaningfully just feels so VERY wrong...

another passage of scripture comes to mind:

 While Jesus was still talking to the crowd, his mother and brothers stood outside, wanting to speak to him.  Someone told him, “Your mother and brothers are standing outside, wanting to speak to you.”

He replied to him, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?”  Pointing to his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers.  For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.”

Matthew 12:46-50

the closeness we have, kind of by default, as fellow believers planted in the same church, called to ministry together, called to love one another with this kind of "rejoicing together-mourning together - being Jesus to one another" love is rooted in sharing what is most important in our lives and that is our Saviour.. the call to be like Him, the call to point each other to Him as the source of all we need to know for life and godliness.. there is something about this that is thicker even than blood...

it's the spiritual family.. not surprising really, we are all brothers and sisters in Christ..

so, I am acknowledging that God, the Sovereign God over all creation has us in this place where for now we are lacking these kind of relationships.. has us in the place where being ripped out of the fabric of such family ties and intimacy we feel like all our limbs have been amputated.. acknowledging that only the manufacturer can heal such wounds and He will, in His time.. He will also allow new connections to grow.. based on that same "co-heir of Christ kind of kinship" and allow us to bless and be blessed.. again...

 As you come to him, the living Stone—rejected by humans but chosen by God and precious to him—  you also, like living stones, are being built into a spiritual house to be a holy priesthood, offering spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ. For in Scripture it says:

“See, I lay a stone in Zion,

    a chosen and precious cornerstone,

and the one who trusts in him

    will never be put to shame.”

1 Peter 2:4-6

I am looking forward to the new year to connect in some more meaningful ways with this new family, while worshipping together and hearing the Word preached each Sunday is laying a foundation for all the things He has for us.. to become crafted in, to bear fruit, to find our place as living stones, part of this building, the church, to minister and come along side each other, thankful and expectant to find out what this will look like!!! God is GOOD all the time!

..it never hurts to be looking for "son"shine... Eeyore

I have always gravitated to Eeyore... I feel some kinship.. can relate to that cloud that continually seems to be following him... I love how gentle he is and kind, in his sad state always trying to be ok..

I took a few moments today to read through the few posts of the last weeks .. and I do think that there seems to be an overabundance of trials... one after the other gets added and some just hang around...

knew that and have been known to say things like this before: I know God is teaching me, shaping me and refining me through this, I know that everything that comes my way is informed by His purposeful goodness, but... could I just get a little break... just for a while????

well, was I put into my place last Sunday..
I have to say as lonely and displaced that I feel here in my new "home town" I am so extremely thankful for that church the Lord has put us in..
yes, we don't really know anyone and that is hard for both of us.
but, man is it ever a good church.
amazing, genuine worship, and GREAT preaching..the truth being proclaimed and the hard stuff not avoided.. so blessed to be there, no question about that..

so, I was put in my place... like all the others that kind of think they have been refined enough, thank you very much ..

the Lord disciplines the ones He loves.. true
He will not give up on us but will bring to completion the good work He started... true..
He knows best... very true
so what if that black cloud is following me.. so what the losses and difficulties never seem to end..

there is blessing in knowing Him in the storm
there is blessing in waiting
there is blessing in getting glimpses of what He is doing once in a while
there is blessing in His purposes for my life
there is blessing in being able to share the comfort I received through all those trials with those around me
there is blessing in seeing His goodness everywhere, just because I HAVE to focus on Him to survive
there are blessings.. too many to count.. to know that I am desperate for Him,
that He is the air I breath, that it is He who carries me, it is He who holds on to me, when I feel all I can do is hold on to Him..
there is blessing in seeing the new things He does, the amazing things He does..
there is blessing in being lonely if it drives me to Him
there is blessing in knowing Him more and more and more and more..

He is faithful
He is committed
He is perfect in love
He is SOVEREIGN
and worthy to be praised.

I am human, and kind of an Eeyore-person.. so, I know He forgives me for feeling like I need a break, but I know that I have to take my eyes off myself and fix them on what is eternal... JESUS...
and that's all there is to it.
I am blessed.