truth is, I am in constant awe of Him.. and I am constantly learning new things (talk about being in your fifties and still so far from knowing and understanding it all...)
just looking at where I am today, the fact that a year ago I got to marry the man that God had made especially for me, restoring the years the locusts have eaten,
the fact that God did want us to live here, far away from where He had blessed me with a tight-knit safety net of "Christ beside me"... far away from my beloved children and those sisters in the Lord He had for me during all those very tough years of an unhappy marriage and a horrible ripping apart of what was meant to be forever..
how He has been using these particular circumstances to allow our marriage to grow stronger..
the fact that through all kinds of complications and delays in many different ways I am finding myself in the " no traveling outside the country" stage of my immigration process, hard as that has been at times, I can see what He is doing... how He is working even something as random as this out to be good ...
again proof that my God is sovereign and that nothing, nothing at all ever happens without either Him ordaining or permitting it...
I am amazed that He has used all the heartaches and trials and losses of the last years to have me in a place where I love Him more, trust Him more and obey Him more.
He has me in a place of hearing from Him more, knowing His presence and guidance more, just in tune with Him like never before...
like David, hiding in the cave from his enemies, his soul seeking God's face, in desperation deciding to stand firm on what He knew about this God, that was his God, who he was intimately acquainted with, I have learned to stand on what I know to be true about Him and to not allow circumstances to dictate what I am feeling, to meditate on what He has done for me in the past and just to seek His presence at all times.
there are enemies that are trying to make my life miserable, there are those that not knowing what they are doing are allowing satan to use them to try and trip me up.. thanks to God to no avail..
trust and obedience are all we need when faced with trials of any kind... forgiveness and perseverance, keeping on keeping on.. as far as it depends on us, living at peace with everyone
trusting the Lord to give and take away according to His perfect plan for our lives, striving to be content in all circumstances, living a life so filled with the joy of knowing Him that we embrace any kind of trial and discipline He sees fit for us to walk through ( never alone, Praise be to Him)
For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen.
For the things that are seen are temporary, but the things that are unseen are eternal.
2 Corinthians 4: 17-18
looking to Him, having my eyes fixed on Him, who IS my peace, I am allowed to see glimpses of His goodness and my heart overflows once again
walking with Him in perfect harmony through the good, the bad and the ugly, I am falling more and more in love with Him, my Redeemer and King... the lover of my soul..
Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God!
How unsearchable are his judgments and how inscrutable his ways!
“For who has known the mind of the Lord,
or who has been his counselor?”
“Or who has given a gift to him
that he might be repaid?”
For from him and through him and to him are all things.
To him be glory forever. Amen.
Romans 11:33-36
and somehow, He loves me.
how can I not love Him back and put Him first in EVERYTHING?
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