Wednesday, October 31, 2012

.. I deserve better than that???...

it seems that the issue of pride comes up wherever I go these days...
Cell group last night, sharing with fellow Christians about what the Lord is teaching us..
and again this truth...
so many of our sins are rooted in pride:

do I get annoyed easily?   ( is my standard the be all and end all?)
do I have a critical spirit? ( I must think too highly of myself ..)
do I want my way always? ( because I obviously know better.. and why would that be???)
do I feel a sense of entitlement, to be treated better, to be understood more?? ( I deserve better than that..)

this is what the Webster's Dictionary from 1828 says:

Pride: Inordinate self-esteem; an unreasonable conceit of one's own superiority in talents, beauty, wealth, accomplishments, rank or elevation in office, which manifests itself in lofty airs, distance, reserve, and often in contempt of others. Insolence; rude treatment of others; insolent exultation.

pride is what made Eve fall for the scheme of the serpent... the lure of receiving the same knowledge as God.. now wouldn't that just be grand...

the new passage for the week starting today:

But thanks be to God,  who always leads us as captives in Christ's triumphal procession and uses us to spread the aroma  of the knowledge  of him everywhere.   For we are to God the pleasing aroma  of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing.   To the one we are an aroma that brings death;  to the other, an aroma that brings life. And who is equal to such a task?   Unlike so many, we do not peddle the word of God for profit.  On the contrary, in Christ we speak before God with sincerity,  as those sent from God.  ( 2 Corinthians 2:14-17 )

 a bit boastful maybe?????? towards the end... but then it goes on:

Such confidence  we have through Christ before God.   Not that we are competent in ourselves  to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God.  ( 2 Corinthians 3: 4 + 5 )

because... this is true about all of us:

At one time  we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another.   But when the kindness  and love of God our Savior  appeared,   he saved us,  not because of righteous things we had done,  but because of his mercy.  He saved us through the washing  of rebirth and renewal  by the Holy Spirit,  whom he poured out on us  generously through Jesus Christ our Savior,   so that, having been justified by his grace,  we might become heirs  having the hope  of eternal life. ( Titus 3: 3-7 ) ( shared with me today by a great guy :)

so, that no one can boast.... it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—  not by works..  for we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

my confidence is in Him alone... I am in awe that He would choose me, to be His beloved child and to spread His aroma to those that don't know Him.. #SoliDeoGloria



Monday, October 29, 2012

..until you came along...

okay.. so yesterday .. in church, I was overwhelmed by the gratitude I was feeling, the tears were flowing once again during worship time..
His Goodness does that to me time and time again...
with my two older daughters next to me in church I knew that I was not mistaken when I said before that the most important thing for me is to know that my daughters love the Lord... and strive to follow Him..
the fact that today I have more reason than ever to trust that the Holy Spirit indeed dwells in them made my heart overflow with thankfulness and joy...

later last night, when driving home my youngest was texting with the new man in my life.. and again, tears of joy, hearing her giggling... how precious..
still really hesitating to believe that this might be something real.. far too early really to know this for certain.. yet ...I am embracing the joyful moments..
trusting Him to know what is best for me..

so, my wonderful new fav artist, Audrey Assad, even has a song for the hesitant, cautious me right now: ( she, not so cautious or hesitant... but anyways... )

Until you came along

I‘ve never been one to sing like a nightingale.. no
I always got some blue notes to tip my scale ...from sweet to sad
I have never been one to laugh about my life .. no
I’ve usually got another lament to write

until you came along I was a half unfinished song
and my heart was beating slower than ever
I never thought, that I could feel this way

you opened my heart up with your honesty oh ohh
now everything is brighter, more beautiful to see
and I, I realize that love is a wonderful thing
it’s so simple, it’s what I was missing yeah

until you came along, I was a half unfinished song
and my heart was beating slower than ever
I never thought that I could feel this way
until you came along,
oo yeah

and it’s okay to laugh about things sometime haha haha hahahaha
it’s okay to be a little silly once in a while ooo yeah
how did I make it "48" years without knowing that it’s love that makes me feel good
that’s alright, that’s alright yeah


until you came along I had a million sad songs
and my heart was beating slower than ever
I never thought that I can feel this way
until you came along, I was a half unwritten song
and my heart was beating slower than ever
I never thought that I could feel this way

this is what Jesus said: If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father’s commands and remain in his love.  I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete.  My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 
( John 15:10-12)

Saturday, October 27, 2012

..coming full circle?????

the last few years have been rather hard on my girls and me .. all of them had to deal with the break up of the family.. all of them were affected in a different way.. different ages, different personalities and different circumstances..

the faith of all three of them was shaken.. questions and doubts..  after all, what had God done to protect them from all the hurt and rejection..

make no mistake, even though the husband rejects the wife, the children feel rejected as well... security is taken away and all of a sudden many things that seemed real are found out to be lies..

such a harsh reality..
thanks to God I never doubted His love and protection, but then again I had been walking with Him through many, many years of suffering and had grown in my understanding of what it means to know Christ in His sufferings, that things intended for evil He turns into good, that He is trustworthy and faithful...

my heart was broken, for myself and for what my girls  had to go through..

the last 6 months or so have brought some healing for them, some more turmoil for some, but dealing with things for others..

over all, my daughters are returning to the Father they can trust and that makes me so very happy... it is amazing to see just how faithful He is to them... how He has been growing them up through the sadness, how He has never let them go.. how my prayers for them were always heard..

I knew it... but I couldn't quite see it.. yet..
I am feeling that we are coming full circle... at least "most of us"... full circle does not mean the absence of conflict, things to deal with, I mean full circle in regards to our relationship with Christ... feeling so very blessed that I am sure today that I will be spending eternity with my beloved children...
they have been given to me as a gift... a gift I get to keep for forever...
God is so good...

Children are a gift from the Lord;
    they are a reward from him.
Psalm 127:3


Friday, October 19, 2012

.. the root of every sin is PRIDE :S

thinking and praying about how my life might significantly change over the next little while I made a HORRIBLE discovery...

I am a lot more proud than I would like to think... oh my...seriously??????

just yesterday my pastor and I talked about how being humble is one sign of a born again Christian walking with his / her Saviour..
understanding that we do not bring ANYTHING to the equation, that anything that is good in us is good because God made us this way.. that, once we are saved He continues to change us to be more like Him and how we will never be completely transformed until entering heaven..

know all this, believe all this and function that way in many areas of my life... thanks to God alone that is..

thinking about what God is doing / allowing in my life right now and the implications all that might have I realized that indeed in at least one area I am proud...

growing up a child of a successful and wealthy business man and being sure ( because my father told me so,  the only thing he ever praised me about ) that I am smart, a logical thinker, yaha...... I guess I became proud of my intelligence and knowledge..

can't quite explain it, because I do not, and have never felt that I was better than anyone else, and especially since I have become a Christian never ever would have entertained any thought like this..
by His grace alone, I know that..

and yet...  I guess, like my Jesus pointed out to me today, I was proud...

pride is the root of all sin. it causes us to turn away from God instead of turning to Him... all disobedience has pride as its root... all rebellion has pride behind it... all mistreatment of other people is caused by pride: someone putting their self and their feelings above the other person and their feelings...

I want nothing to do with pride.. God hates pride, I abhor it when I see it... in others.. it terrifies me to see the pride in myself..
I prayed and repented and I am welcoming whatever the Lord has for me on this journey to strip me of any pride there might be.
humbly I want only to point to Him as the root of anything good, ( math skills included) in me...

I love how He convicts and lovingly reprimands.. most of all I am thankful for His forgiveness and grace.. I do not deserve it but happily accept it..
To Him Alone be the Glory!!!!






Thursday, October 18, 2012

... hope that does NOT disappoint....

meeting with clients throughout the week, I appreciate the reminder from this weeks passage.. this is what I am striving for..

For our boast is this, the testimony of our conscience, that we behaved in the world with simplicity and godly sincerity, not by earthly wisdom but by the grace of God, and supremely so toward you....  ( 2 Corinthians 1:12 )

praying this morning that not "earthly wisdom" would inform my conversations with the girls here at Hope for Life and anyone else for that matter, but His wisdom and Godly sincerity...

so easy to forget about that, so easy to be compassionate and loving without pointing everyone to Christ,.. so easy to give advice and counsel coming just from me, not from God..

even if I knew everything the world has to offer women facing an unplanned pregnancy they would miss out on the eternal hope Jesus has to offer..

it is good to be reminded of what Hope for Life really stands for.. Hope for this life, Hope for the life of the unborn but ultimately Eternal Life for whoever will receive the gift from the Saviour..

Celebrating our first Birthday this weekend I thank God for this timely reminder..
it is all about Him and the hope He alone can offer.. all I need to be is a willing, empty vessel for Him to use..

we all are ministering to someone in our lives,  loving and caring for someone who does not have a relationship with Christ.. someone who is struggling to make it on their own.. let's tap into the wealth of wisdom and guidance and hope that is all ours in Christ Jesus.. let's live simple and honest lives, relying on Jesus for all we need and by our walk others will be able to find the hope that will never disappoint..

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God.  Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance;  perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. ( Romans 5 : 1-5 )

Loving the Hope that does NOT DISAPPOINT!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

... when I am weak, then I am strong...

I have had it all before.. chest pain, headaches, revolting digestive system... all because of stress..
not "really" sick, that's what they say... real pain, real symptoms, just no physical but rather an emotional reason..
pretty sad, really..
this time joint pain is added to the list... weird... makes no sense..
my knees especially...
there is a German proverb.. says something like someone is trying to bring you to your knees, as in is trying real hard to bring you down..
as a Christian there is another way of looking at this.. yes, someone is, has been trying to bring me down, he has been using all kinds of people and circumstances..
but there is the One who takes those situations and turns them into something good ( Romans 8:28)


But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.  That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. ( 2 Corinthians 12: 9 + 10)

so, I am weak... my knees hurt, so does my heart.. my stomach can't "stomach" it anymore, but I am at peace.. perfect peace..  I am delighting in the hardship, brought on by one who was supposed to watch out for me.. I am embracing the difficulties..

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. ( Philippians 4: 6 + 7 )

my soul is at peace, even though my body is suffering the fallout from the stress right now, I can truly say that ALL IS WELL WITH MY SOUL...
He, the Saviour and Redeemer of my soul is worthy to be praised now and forever more !!!!







Sunday, October 14, 2012

.. do you think you matter to God???

everyone is on a journey, we all are somewhere... all in different places.. the One who made us is the only One who knows where we all are and where we are going, He knows the reason we are where we are and  He has a plan for each of us..
the plan ultimately is to restore us to Himself...
this is all He ever wanted..
He created us in His image..
He created this earth for us, He gave us all we needed and a purpose..

and then, we messed it up..

since then, it has been about us coming back to Him..

it took His Son to be sacrificed, the Firstborn, without blemishes, the Lamb of God..
so that we could be reconciled.. that we could return to Him and remain with Him..

when we get saved, we become His, He sees Jesus' righteousness when He looks at us, He loves us like He loves His Son, He gives us all we need..

and yet, there we are, the Holy Spirit in us, we know we are His now and all of our sins are forgiven..
but we are still broken, we still are missing what was supposed to be ours.. all that Jesus always had.. His core needs met by His Father..

safety, security, value, purpose, consistent love.. knowing that He was the Beloved, and that His Father was well pleased with Him..

we all have these needs.. living in a broken world however, none of us has received any of this the way it should have been.. no one's fault.. no one to blame, just a fact..

so there He is now, Jesus, the Lover of my Soul, God, my Heavenly Father, the Spirit, the Counsellor and Comforter..
I matter to them / Him.. the triune God..
we all do..

He knows what has transpired in our lives, He knows our hang ups...  the longing we have.. the longing to have the soul of a well loved child..
the child who would have known safety, security, love, value and purpose.. the child who would have been able to trust, because her parents were delighted to have her.. would have never let her down..  or made her feel unwanted or not good enough... or frightened her, by their absence or disinterest.. or maybe even by their abuse.. emotional, verbal, physical or even sexual..

again... no one to blame.. we all have had parents that had parents that had parents.....

He, though... the Father.. He knows what it will take to rebuild that safety that we so crave.. allowing Him to come and touch the places of our pain is the first step..

so, no wonder that "event" of last week happened when it happened... still no protection from the one who was supposed to make me feel safe during my childhood.. he still is the one that by his total disregard for me, places me in situations that are frightening..

I have forgiven before and tried to be okay with it.. after all, being a child of God meant I was restored, healed and had all that I needed... truth is, I do not need to pretend.. I can be real about the fact that I am still hurt, vulnerable and sad... I have let my father of the hook, I am not blaming him, I am just saying that my core need to feel safe, loved and valued was not met and that it left me vulnerable...

He, my Father, He will never leave me or forsake me, He delights over me with singing, I am His beloved and He has been with me all along... He will never leave me to face anything difficult without being right there for me.. He will always keep me safe..
He alone is able to love like this.. no one else is..

as Jesus has led me along the path of healing He will continue to do so.. He will reclaim my brokenness  and restore my security.. He has brought me very far indeed.. I am not  all there, but I know that in His time He will complete the good work He has started in me...
so glad that NO ONE can thwart His plans.. He is the Sovereign God.. and I matter to Him..
I really do :)

Saturday, October 13, 2012

.. intimacy with God : into - me - see !!!!!

at the Women's retreat of my church...
after the last bump / hurdle / nightmare happened on Wednesday I contemplated for a second not going to the retreat ... my default reaction to turmoil is to hide from these kind of events..
I do seek out the one on one, but groups, as fun as they can be, seem a little too much when faced with such adversity..
thankfully during my walk with my Saviour I have learned, that He has me where He has me, when He has me there, for a reason :)
and so I did not entertain this thought for more than a second..

after an evening and a morning session with the speaker I already know that , once again, the author and perfecter of my faith is just so marvellously amazing in how He leads, guides and works things out for his children...
I have taken tons of notes and have had a few great revelations from God, I have had affirmations about things He is doing and I have been deeply blessed..

my body is revolting, and so I am just using the free time to let this run it's course because come hell or high water I am going to be at the evening session tonite and at the one tomorrow morning..

His spirit is here with us and I want to take in whatever it is He has for me..

as a young child I was lying in bed thinking there had to be more to life than what it looked like to me when observing what was going on... searching everywhere I had prayed for 6 months that He would please show me what it was, that I was missing..until He finally revealed Himself to me and the fact that there was a relationship with Him to be had....

since this happened 18 years and 3 months ago the longing for even more has been the driving force behind my drawing closer and closer to Him...
suffering throughout my life has made me long for that "well loved soul of a child" the state of being before things were done to me that were wrong,  before I made wrong choices... this place, when He, before the foundation of the World already chose me to be His, when he fashioned me in the depth of the earth, when I was knit together in my mother's womb... no matter how broken my heart and my soul was, I always knew there had to be that secure place of being..  this place where I was loved, safe and valued...where my arrival was anticipated and welcomed ..

deep in my soul, I remembered, I remember... I know... I feel and am  more sure of now than ever before, that my Heavenly Father is loving me this way... is excited to walk with me.. has this close relationship with me..
and in it, the broken pieces of my heart, the rubble is cleared away, I am reclaimed and restored..

it is all about intimacy... the speaker gave it a "new twist" by breaking the word down this way:
into - me - see..... now how cool is that...

this is, at least for me, what it is all about... the longing to be seen, deep inside, to know and to be known, by God the Father, Jesus the Son and the Holy Spirit, the Counselor...

longing to be known and to know the people close to me, my children, my friends and the ones the Lord brings into my life to minister to..
just recently I have been allowed to meet this man, this friend of mine... and this is what we are doing.. into me he sees.... and he lets me see into him.... together we can be known and know Jesus..
pretty cool I would say.....  :)

Thursday, October 11, 2012

the blessing in the turmoil :)

I am humbled and blessed, moved to tears, because, even though such garbage is going on all around me, the GOOD that God is doing in my life far outweighs my light and momentary troubles...
those troubles and persevering through them will achieve an eternal glory so tremendous, so worth every second of sadness and turmoil...
have held onto that scripture for a long time...but just now my Jesus has added something for me..

the GOOD in my life is actually a fellow follower of my Lord and Saviour.. a fellow follower that loves Him with the same kind of passion I have for Him...

 a humble man of God, whose transparency and ability to share himself, his strengths and weaknesses and his love for God in a way I have not had the privilege to experience before, blesses me like I have never been blessed before..

talking to him just now has met one of my deepest needs..  the need to share from the bottom of my heart and soul with someone who understands me and whose soul resonates with mine ..
with perfect ease,  so very relaxed and peaceful..

so, nothing has changed, the trouble is still trouble.... God is still God, His love is still His love, and this man of God is a HUGE blessing to me..

his presence in my life is a gift from God I will not take for granted... as we are exploring the possibilities and wait for God's plans to unfold, we both are trusting Him for the plans He has for us, plans to prosper us and not to harm us, plans to give us a hope and a future.. however that will look.. individually and maybe together.. always making sure we are not running ahead but let God take the lead ...

 so there... now y'all know :)

.. so utterly burdened...despairing of life itself??


so God, you know the One who is not surprised that around this last corner of my path there was a huge bump.. again.. so, He, the Creator and Sovereign God of the Universe, He, has me and the rest of my church family dwell on and meditate on this passage of scripture this week:


...For we do not want you to be unaware, brothers, of the affliction we experienced in Asia. For we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself.  Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death. But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead.  He delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will deliver us again.  You also must help us by prayer, so that many will give thanks on our behalf for the blessing granted us through the prayers of many.... ( 2 Corinthians 1 :  8-11 )

today when sharing the latest burden placed on my shoulders and my heart ( chest pain again, no surprises here either ) with my friend and mentor she pointed out the similarities...

as this potentially horrific situation unfolds I feel so utterly burdened beyond my strength... deep inside I am fighting not to despair of life itself... emotionally speaking it definitely feels like a death sentence...

realizing that whatever the outcome of this new/old situation in my life, all of it, every little detail will have been sifted through the loving fingers of my loving heavenly Father... He has delivered me from horrific situations before, so on Him do I set my hope to deliver me again.. relying on Him, and Him alone...

when posting that my day had been bad, many of my friends responded telling me they were praying... like Paul asked the Corinthians to do.. so that many will give thanks on behalf of the blessings granted to me through the prayers of those beloved friends...

reading my Bible as a little girl it fascinated me enough to read it many times.. today, it is the lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path.. it never fails to meet me, wherever I am, in such a profound way.. no wonder, because this is a fact:

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.  He was in the beginning with God.  All things were made through him, and without him was not any thing made that was made. ( John 1: 1-3 )

my Jesus... the Word... not anything was made without Him.. He is the One we are meeting when we read the Word... loving this, no matter how this all will end.



Wednesday, October 10, 2012

.. pushed into the pit???.. again???


I have had a great, really great month... I have started to believe that maybe things could be getting significantly better.. and they are, not that they were that bad.. even through the hardest times I have been blessed... God has been there for me in the deepest valley.. He has led me out of the pit, and has shown me His faithful and unconditional love ..
He has given me a purpose and a calling and He has blessed me by allowing me to bless others.. He has comforted me and in turn I have been able to comfort others..
I know that there are people in my life that are in the darkness, I also know that I have been let down by significant people that should have been looking out for me...
today I received some more proof of just how this affects my life.. it seems I cannot escape.. 
for a few hours the dark clouds have been enveloping me, tainting everything it seemed... but this is what is TRUE, still.....

Answer me when I call, O God of my righteousness!
    You have given me relief when I was in distress.
    Be gracious to me and hear my prayer!
O men, how long shall my honor be turned into shame?
    How long will you love vain words and seek after lies? Selah
 But know that the Lord has set apart the godly for himself;
    the Lord hears when I call to him.
Be angry, and do not sin;
    ponder in your own hearts on your beds, and be silent. Selah
 Offer right sacrifices,
    and put your trust in the Lord.
 There are many who say, “Who will show us some good?
    Lift up the light of your face upon us, O Lord!”
 You have put more joy in my heart
    than they have when their grain and wine abound.
 In peace I will both lie down and sleep;
    for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety.

in Him alone is my safety found.. I know the one who wants to destroy the good that God is doing in my life.. I will not allow him a foothold .. I will, in the name of the One who died to save me, in Jesus name, command him to leave me alone..
I will put my trust in the Lord.. for He is trustworthy and He my refuge and my fortress..
I will thank Him for the great plans He has for me. 
I will give Him all my worries and fears and insecurities and I know that I am safe in His arms..

oh what would I do without Him and His Word.. I have no clue.. the good news is that I do not have to be without either..
Praise be to Him!!!

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

...mind blowing blessings...

the God of all comfort... who is He? how do we know? and what does the comfort look like..
He is God Almighty, He is the Sovereign God, He is all knowing and all powerful, nothing happens here that He has not allowed for His purposes..

how do we know? His Word tells us... His Word tells us also how much He loves us, that He keeps us in the palm of His hands, that He has plans to prosper us and not to harm us, that He is our refuge, our shelter, and that Jesus, His son understands all our suffering..

Comfort.. what does it look like? we first think of the comfort of a parent to a child.. hugs and kisses, encouraging words, closeness and tenderness.. and that He has for us.. but it is not all..
we can find comfort in who He is.. his Faithfulness and Power, His Wisdom and Sovereignty...
if He allows the suffering, there has to be a purpose, something good that can come from it for those that love Him, that have been called according to His purpose...

having gone through suffering, receiving His comfort, I have learned that He indeed is trustworthy, that He is all the Bible tells me He is.. and more..
 I know Him more, count on Him more and trust Him more because of my suffering...

He has taught me about Himself, this world, myself, through the suffering and He has made me more compassionate for others..

I love Him more and I know so much better how much He loves me...

this weekend, He surprised me once again.. in His love for me He had orchestrated a gift for me... only He could have put it together like this.. one mind blowing detail after another.. blessings flowing freely from Him to me.. disbelief and JOY like not known to me before...
 my fragile heart..overflowing with gratitude... really? that's how much He loves me???  me???  a sinner who has already been given so much more than she deserves... eternal life with Him.. a relationship with Him, walking closely with the lover of my soul... and now this???

Loving Him with a passion that knows no equal... every fibre of my body, mind and soul saturated with a love that knows no end... created and instigated by the Creator of the Universe, God the Father, Jesus the Son and the Holy Spirit, Three in one....

it cannot get any better than this... but then again... there are no limits for the love He has for me... and you... :)


Wednesday, October 3, 2012

.. He comforts us so that we can comfort others...

if what happened today would have happened a few years ago ( and it actually did all the time back then ) the day would have been a write off..
today.. it got to me, I have to admit, but my Father in His love is sheltering me from any harm.. so I am good...
reading in 2 Corinthians Chapter 1: 3-7 this morning:

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort,  who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.  For as we share abundantly in Christ's sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. If we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; and if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which you experience when you patiently endure the same sufferings that we suffer.  Our hope for you is unshaken, for we know that as you share in our sufferings, you will also share in our comfort.

in short form: God does not waste any hurts...

so the ultimate blow in the category of "hurt inflicted by hurting people putting you down out of anger".. almost 3 years ago, in this case "selfish abandonment, was not wasted... on the contrary..
it forced me to even draw closer and rely more on this Daddy of mine.. he met me and I now know beyond a shadow of a doubt that He will be there for me..He will comfort me..
anytime something like this comes my way now, I just crawl up in His arms..
they are always open, He is always compassionate and He always has time for me, and really really wants to know what is going on...

hurts are never wasted with God because in turn I am able to understand people that are hurting themselves so much better...and can extend that  comfort I received, to them..

as we share in Christ's suffering we also share abundantly in His comfort.. and as the hurt person is suffering a similar hurt we have, they too can be comforted with the same comfort that comforted us..
brilliant...

trouble here will never end... it changes at times, it comes in many different shapes and sizes... but it will always be there...
continuing on my path, His peace in my heart.. and a joy.. an expectation.. something good is on the way... VERY SHORTLY.. :)
Praise God from whom all blessings flow.. He is GOOD ALL THE TIME!!!!!

Let His Light shine!!!

verses and thoughts and excitement has been percolating in my mind and soul... heartache and chaos and difficulty have been going on at the same time so percolating was all that happened..
not writing it down, but rather focusing on the task ahead.. how to be a godly mother and coach to my daughter, how to be a counsellor to a client / "in my heart adopted daughter"...

some settling down has happened and so maybe I can have a look at all the vigorous percolating action..

someone asked me what it was about me and Lighthouses... well, I said, I love them.....
:) during prayer time on Monday, someone, again, prayed about us being a Light on a hill.. shining the love of Jesus into the world..
ha... I love it.. a beacon of light, in the darkness.. a lighthouse.. visible in the fog of brokenness and hurt.. guiding the steps of the lost..


Here are some scriptures:


The people who walked in darkness
    have seen a great light;
those who dwelt in a land of deep darkness,
    on them has light shone. ( Isaiah 9:2 )


if you pour yourself out for the hungry
    and satisfy the desire of the afflicted,
then shall your light rise in the darkness
    and your gloom be as the noonday ( Isaiah 58:10 )

and Jesus said:

“You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. (Matthew 5:14)
"I have come into the world as light, so that whoever believes in me may not remain in darkness"
( John 12:46 )

I love it... Jesus came and He was the light.. He saved us and called us out of the darkness into His marvellous light... so now, through the cracks of our broken vessels, all according to His plan, can we shine His light into the darkness of others.. so now we are pouring ourselves out for the hungry and afflicted.. and again His light will shine...

in light ( pun intended ;) of the newest developments reported to us at a Dream Team Outreach Meeting, I know we will be able to take this light into an area where the darkness is especially dark, if you know what I mean.... His light will shine and illuminate a path out of the chaos and hopelessness for those He will make His own.. Hallelujah!!!